Three weeks have gone by since my epic bachelorette party in NYC, and I am still in Full Recovery Mode from a heaping dose of Too Much Fun. It was a spectacular weekend full of nonstop yappin’, dancin’ and memory makin’, and I’ll be answering all your burning Qs (DM me questions at @omgskr) in the next newsletter re: all the juicy deets—what we wore, what we ate, what we used the most from our Hangover Kits, etc.

In the meantime, I was thinking a lot about how much the internet — Instagram, in particular — has really distorted our view of what a bachelorette party “should” look like. Even though I’ve attended countless fetes with a variety of themes and agendas, when I first started planning, all I could envision was a dozen perfectly toned women sprawled out in a $500/night hotel cabana wearing matching Baywatch swimsuits that say BRIDE SQUAD, accompanied by the caption: 100% that bach!

(Related: we must stop abbreviating bachelorette as bach. Prolific composer Johann Sebastian Bach rolls over in his grave every time we write it that way. What if we introduced a new short form option, like… ‘rette. Eh?? “My ‘rette is next month!” Maybe?? OK, I’m not here to set trends.)

Anyway, while I admit I’m an aesthetic connoisseur with very particular tastes, it made me think about how many of these parties are strictly for the ‘gram instead of the matter at hand. While I’d love a seemingly perfect and visually stunning weekend (we all know how much work that takes!), I’d much rather have 48 hours of me and my besties embodying no pressure, no stress and nothing but straight-up F words (fun, friendship, flexibility, French 75s, etc.)

I’m not saying you can’t have it all! We all want fab pictures and fun videos of us in our element — there’s so much enjoyment in having a damn good time and being able to look back fondly at the proof for years to come. But the stress that comes with executing a weekend that looks picture-perfect is something I decided to let go of as the weekend commenced. (See: picture of my hotel room decor below.) Above all, I just wanted to make sure I honored my friendships by having as much as fun (and downtime) as humanly possible, all while truly enjoying each other’s company — and wearing our matching pearl-studded sunglasses at least some of the time.

My wish for you as you and your friends plan your ‘rette (see, you’re getting used to it, no?), is to take the pressure off yourself. Have an itinerary that is centered around doing the things you love, not doing the things that look the most fab on IG. If that’s watching a marathon of movies or being horizontal on a chaise lounge for two days or doing something lowkey like an escape room (although wedding planning itself is its own escape room), then go for it. If that’s looking hot as fuck on a yacht, girl, live it up. I’d take a million pictures of that, too.

I definitely danced on tables, went to an aesthetically-pleasing beach club, had super-cute custom items and took too many photos of us with martinis, but it was a minor element of a major celebration. My 20-pic album recap doesn’t show us sleeping late or lounging around on Sunday afternoon. It doesn’t show the moments my friends and I were just laughing and recounting our favorite memories with each other and not posing strategically or in go-go-go mode. Those kind of moments are hard to capture — and that, my friends, is a very good thing.

HOT TAKES

Realistic Bachelorette Themes

Here are some more realistic bachelorette themes I came up with if you’re tired of “Bride’s Last Rodeo” and “The Final Fiesta.”

Babes, Booze & Comfortable Shoes

It’s giving vaguely orthopedic & our feet are grateful.

Women. Wine. In Bed by 9.

This one speaks for itself.

A Little Back Pain & a Lot of Champagne

We’re poppin’ bottles! Of Veuve and Advil. (Not at the same time.)

Glitz, Aperol Spritz & Hangover Shits

We can still make the whole place shimmer! Until Sunday morning.

Diamonds, Day Drinking & Slightly Damaging Documentation

Bring the bling. Bring the mimosas. Bring the digi cam full of Lindsey’s wardrobe mishaps.

Bottles, Boots & No One’s Bullshit, Please

It’s not anyone’s first rodeo, y’all.

Chums, Rums & Tums

It’s giving besties. It’s giving beach cocktails. It’s giving heartburn.

Say Yes to the Mess

Your whole life is organized. Time to embrace the chaos.

Rock N Roll & Plenty of Time to Scroll

Let’s rage. Then let’s lie in bed for five hours and watch TikToks.

The Last Fling Before the Sling (There was a Dancing Injury)

Oops, someone didn’t stretch enough before getting on top of the table.

TELL US EVERYTHING

Take A Break From Wedding Planning And Tell Us What You Think

ATTN Brides: we care about more than just your wedding. Take a break from planning to tell us a little bit more about yourself. And while you’re at it, what do you want to see from us? More niche content? Custom IRL events? Let us know at betches.co/survey and you could win a $100 gift card.

Say Yes To These Reads

This bride's engagement was called off two weeks before her destination wedding. Her family celebrated with her in Italy anyway.
This designer starts GoFundMe after claiming bride 'stole' her wedding dress – but who was telling the truth?
Can orgasms make you smarter? Your post-o glow might come with extra brainpower.

WANT MORE BETCHES?

💡Get pop cultured with The Pop Off

🎙Stay informed with The Sup

⭐️2x weekly horoscopes in Blame It On Retrograde

🍼The moms group chat. What A Mom Wants

🛍️ We're Good At Shopping so you don't have to be

📚 Book recs you actually want The Betch Lit Society

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

Image Sources: Tenor, Giphy, Shutterstock

Our mailing address is:

43 W 24th St

New York, NY 10010

Want to change how you receive these emails?
Update your preferences here

View this email in your browser